YUP! I'm still sticking with the experience. I think if Obama wins, we'll have a bunch of advisers running the country. But, with Hillary, you have, like it or not, two for the price of one.
AND, the buck DOES stop there. No advisers making decisions. Have we forgotten what great shape our county was in when Bill Clinton was our President for eight years???
That's just how I feel. I think Obama is GREAT! And, if this was eight years from now, and he had two more terms in the Senate under his belt, I'd be all for him, probably have a sign in my front yard. BUT, I am sorry - Barack Obama just DOES NOT have enough experience, YET!
Why, oh why, did he make this move now? He is charismatic, and all the rest, BUT the lack of experience will force me to vote for McCain I'm afraid. I don't think I've gone to the R side on the BIGGIE, since Ford. And, I've voted in every presidential election since I was old enough to vote. My dad was Governor Dan Evans campaign chairman for the whole Seattle area. Our house was this BIG mess of campaign literature, even me and my 80+ yr old Grandma went out
door-to-door for good ol' Dan. So, you see I've had politics in my blood from WAY BACK!
Back to John McCain. He's far enough left for me. I think, I could live with him. Anything would be better than what we've got, RIGHT? I'm getting a bit ahead of myself.
I just think with terrorism, the war, and ALL our issues at home, health care, seniors, environmental and don't forget the economy OMG! Sure glad I'm retired! Comfy in my bed writing a couple books and THIS of course. Life is OK.. my grief is settling and right now I'm, "Snug as a bug in a rug" - POOR, but SNUG!
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Gosh I LOVE quotes
Rudy Giuliani, Republican Party Presidential Candidate, tonight in his concession speech after coming in third behind John McCain and Mitt Romney in the Florida primary,
"Leaders dream of a better future, then they help to make it a reality."
Now, I'm not trying to brag, but I had a dream, I was a leader, and I made my dream happen. I took over 10 years of hard, hard, work, but I made it happen.
I remember my kids, back in the mid-nineties, when I'd be up at 3:00 a.m. working on the rules & regulations for The Moms' House, sayings, "MOM, go to bed!" But, I'd keep on, knowing I'd have to get up in a couple of hours and go to work at my STATE job. Two full time jobs for three years, not to mention going out as a time-keeper for forest fires during the summer for 10 years.
When I put Ernie in treatment for smoking pot at 16, (he didn't have a horrible drug problem, BUT I wanted him to LEARN about what he may have inherited, alcoholism and drug abuse wise, and about the long-term and REAL issues that go along with using and abusing.) He hated me for it at the time, but like I said before, he ended up being a VERY smart and wise beyond his years young man, earlier than I thought he would.
The treatment program provided a week long live-in co-dependent's treatment thing for parents and spouses. EVERYONE said I was a workaholic. I had never thought I was that, but it was the first time that my desire to do SO much became evident to me. Especially when I compared myself and my activities to the other parents/spouses.
Back to the I have a dream thing. It's not that you have to have a dream, per say, but we all have ideas, and some of us want to make things better and bring your ideas to fruition. I had an idea.
The Moms' House was an idea and what happened was my boss, Terry Kirkpatrick, the best boss ever, sent me and a couple other of my DNR co-horts to see Steven Covy. He's a motivation speaker. I took notes, and it was THEN that I thought - I CAN DO THIS.
I began joining Boards, Committees, etc. I was already a foster parent and very involved in my kids' lives and had gone and met with Jim Koval, the Associate Superintendent of the N Thurston School District after my youngest completed middle school of which I thought both boys might as well as not even gone to. Two years a waste of time. Their specific needs were barely met, especially Ernie who had ADD. Teachers calling all the time, "He disruptive," I'd say, "Where's he sitting in your classroom?" and the answer would be something like three rows back blah blah blah in alphabetical order, and I'd say, "Are you aware that children with ADD should be seated at the front of the class?" NO, OF COURSE NOT!! I had to advocate for Ernie and pulled him from school almost a month before the end of eight grade. It wasn't until he got to Puget Sound High School, the district's alternative, that he began to excel. They acknowledged different learning STYLES. Not every child learns through books, some learn through listening. I used to say about my program, "Not all kids are circles and we need different safety nets out here, triangle nets, circle nets and square nets. Different nets for different kinds of kids. My YUP! program is targeting a specific group of kids, and they are coming in droves. Up to 40 kids are showing up on Wednesdays for our meetings in my little living room. They LOVE that these important people are coming to talk to them in this informal setting, AND they're getting a nice dinner. They even get shrimp on their salad. :)"
"Leaders dream of a better future, then they help to make it a reality."
Now, I'm not trying to brag, but I had a dream, I was a leader, and I made my dream happen. I took over 10 years of hard, hard, work, but I made it happen.
I remember my kids, back in the mid-nineties, when I'd be up at 3:00 a.m. working on the rules & regulations for The Moms' House, sayings, "MOM, go to bed!" But, I'd keep on, knowing I'd have to get up in a couple of hours and go to work at my STATE job. Two full time jobs for three years, not to mention going out as a time-keeper for forest fires during the summer for 10 years.
When I put Ernie in treatment for smoking pot at 16, (he didn't have a horrible drug problem, BUT I wanted him to LEARN about what he may have inherited, alcoholism and drug abuse wise, and about the long-term and REAL issues that go along with using and abusing.) He hated me for it at the time, but like I said before, he ended up being a VERY smart and wise beyond his years young man, earlier than I thought he would.
The treatment program provided a week long live-in co-dependent's treatment thing for parents and spouses. EVERYONE said I was a workaholic. I had never thought I was that, but it was the first time that my desire to do SO much became evident to me. Especially when I compared myself and my activities to the other parents/spouses.
Back to the I have a dream thing. It's not that you have to have a dream, per say, but we all have ideas, and some of us want to make things better and bring your ideas to fruition. I had an idea.
The Moms' House was an idea and what happened was my boss, Terry Kirkpatrick, the best boss ever, sent me and a couple other of my DNR co-horts to see Steven Covy. He's a motivation speaker. I took notes, and it was THEN that I thought - I CAN DO THIS.
I began joining Boards, Committees, etc. I was already a foster parent and very involved in my kids' lives and had gone and met with Jim Koval, the Associate Superintendent of the N Thurston School District after my youngest completed middle school of which I thought both boys might as well as not even gone to. Two years a waste of time. Their specific needs were barely met, especially Ernie who had ADD. Teachers calling all the time, "He disruptive," I'd say, "Where's he sitting in your classroom?" and the answer would be something like three rows back blah blah blah in alphabetical order, and I'd say, "Are you aware that children with ADD should be seated at the front of the class?" NO, OF COURSE NOT!! I had to advocate for Ernie and pulled him from school almost a month before the end of eight grade. It wasn't until he got to Puget Sound High School, the district's alternative, that he began to excel. They acknowledged different learning STYLES. Not every child learns through books, some learn through listening. I used to say about my program, "Not all kids are circles and we need different safety nets out here, triangle nets, circle nets and square nets. Different nets for different kinds of kids. My YUP! program is targeting a specific group of kids, and they are coming in droves. Up to 40 kids are showing up on Wednesdays for our meetings in my little living room. They LOVE that these important people are coming to talk to them in this informal setting, AND they're getting a nice dinner. They even get shrimp on their salad. :)"
Monday, January 28, 2008
It Snowed (an inch or two) It's the Pacific NW we don't EVER get THAT much at sea level
I went out on Saturday morning and got my two cars all prepared, just in case it snowed. Drove up to Costco for more antifreeze, as the last time I drove my (I actually inherited it from Ernie) 94 Jeep Cherokee the "check engine' light came on. I thought maybe it was low on water/antifreeze, and I should have before now, gotten that taken care of. But, with a month of migraines, I haven't done much of anything lately.
Anyway, it took a bit of fluid, not that much, but it looks like there may be oil in the water/antifreeze receptacle. Instead of just "green" there was a little red oilish film floating on top. DANG, I hope the block isn't cracked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will SHIT BRICKS (excuse my French) That's funny that we say that. My son just called me from work a few weeks ago and asked, "Why do people say, 'Excuse my French,' when they cuss? Is it because the French cuss a lot?" I had to say I really didn't know and I thought that was the answer.
Back to the Jeep. I just put a new radiator ($500), and a bunch other stuff last fall , getting it all up to snuff for the winter. It's a 4-wheel drive and because it was Ernie's, I REALLY want to keep it, so I pray that it's not too messed up. A cracked block means NEW ENGINE! OMG!
Anyway, it took a bit of fluid, not that much, but it looks like there may be oil in the water/antifreeze receptacle. Instead of just "green" there was a little red oilish film floating on top. DANG, I hope the block isn't cracked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will SHIT BRICKS (excuse my French) That's funny that we say that. My son just called me from work a few weeks ago and asked, "Why do people say, 'Excuse my French,' when they cuss? Is it because the French cuss a lot?" I had to say I really didn't know and I thought that was the answer.
Back to the Jeep. I just put a new radiator ($500), and a bunch other stuff last fall , getting it all up to snuff for the winter. It's a 4-wheel drive and because it was Ernie's, I REALLY want to keep it, so I pray that it's not too messed up. A cracked block means NEW ENGINE! OMG!
Sunday, January 27, 2008
New - The First 48 Quote
"God gives people choices. Some people don't do so well in the choices they make. He's just going to have to pay. He made a bad choice and he's going to pay with the rest of his life" Sgt Connie Justice, Memphis Homicide.
She was speaking on the young man who had just confessed, or should I say, half-a**ed confessed, to robbing a 7-11 type store. He shot and killed the one clerk and would have killed the other clerk, but the gun jammed. The store had video tape and the WHOLE thing was video and audio taped. We could see and hear him doing everything, including yelling at the second clerk to open the drawer, and the clerk telling him, "You just shot that guy for a f***ing $30."
Now, he's going to prison for the rest of his life.
She was speaking on the young man who had just confessed, or should I say, half-a**ed confessed, to robbing a 7-11 type store. He shot and killed the one clerk and would have killed the other clerk, but the gun jammed. The store had video tape and the WHOLE thing was video and audio taped. We could see and hear him doing everything, including yelling at the second clerk to open the drawer, and the clerk telling him, "You just shot that guy for a f***ing $30."
Now, he's going to prison for the rest of his life.
SAG Awards (Screen Actors Guild)
Woo Hoo!!!
The Sopranos has, so far, cleaned house. James Gandolfini and Edie Falco won for Best Actor & Actress in a Drama Series and it also won for Best Ensemble in a TV Drama Series. I was sitting here clapping all by myself on the couch with my three dogs.
I love award shows. I'm sort of a movie buff. Never miss the Academy Awards, Grammy, Emmy's ETC. The only one I'm not really into in is the Tony's. And that's probably because I'm POOR and have never been to NEW YORK, and haven't seen a play - probably since the Junior Program's when I was in Junior High School. Or, was it grade school? Anyway, I'm happy that the Sopranos went out with a bang - or should I say blackout :)...
Ernie, Nels and I would all get together on Sunday's at 6:00 p.m. to watch, not only the Sopranos, but most all of the old HBO series, The Sopranos, OZ, and of course, The Wire (season 5 is going on right now, and OH MY GOSH, Proposition Joe just got killed off by Marlow. You should have seen it. My son and I could NOT BELIEVE IT!!!) The Wire is one of the best shows on television. An OUTSTANDING portrayal and the most true-to-life show I've EVER seen about how life really is for high-risk/street youth, the police, local government and now the newspaper press. Kudos to THE WIRE!!!! Between it and The First 48 I can't decide which is my current favorite show.
Javier Bardem has just won for No Country for Old Men. I haven't seen that yet. I don't get out much, not much energy, so I wait till they come out on DVD, or On Demand/cable. My son did take me to see American Gangsters with Russell Crowe & Denzel Washington. One of the Best Movies I've ever seen (I say that every year or so). Like for CRASH.... I could go on-and-on.
I'm off to watch the rest of the show. Before I go: No Country For Old Men has just won for Movie Ensemble. It's supposed to be real violent - horrifying, so it makes me a bit hesitant to go see it, I mean I haven't even watched Saving Private Ryan yet. I can watch Dr G, and The First 48, but scary movies I just cannot watch. I have nightmares. Isn't that weird. Whenever someone's about to do horrible damage to a human being, I cannot watch. I just can't take it. I can watch how they catch bad guys, but not movies about the bad guys doing the bad stuff.
There I go again. Blah Blah Blah. Now, my TV's on the Closer. I like Kyra too. Although I don't watch her show that often.
I'm outta here. All I have here are DOGs. I guess Blogs make you feel like you're talking to SOMEONE.... sorta funny. At least the computer doesn't talk back :)
The Sopranos has, so far, cleaned house. James Gandolfini and Edie Falco won for Best Actor & Actress in a Drama Series and it also won for Best Ensemble in a TV Drama Series. I was sitting here clapping all by myself on the couch with my three dogs.
I love award shows. I'm sort of a movie buff. Never miss the Academy Awards, Grammy, Emmy's ETC. The only one I'm not really into in is the Tony's. And that's probably because I'm POOR and have never been to NEW YORK, and haven't seen a play - probably since the Junior Program's when I was in Junior High School. Or, was it grade school? Anyway, I'm happy that the Sopranos went out with a bang - or should I say blackout :)...
Ernie, Nels and I would all get together on Sunday's at 6:00 p.m. to watch, not only the Sopranos, but most all of the old HBO series, The Sopranos, OZ, and of course, The Wire (season 5 is going on right now, and OH MY GOSH, Proposition Joe just got killed off by Marlow. You should have seen it. My son and I could NOT BELIEVE IT!!!) The Wire is one of the best shows on television. An OUTSTANDING portrayal and the most true-to-life show I've EVER seen about how life really is for high-risk/street youth, the police, local government and now the newspaper press. Kudos to THE WIRE!!!! Between it and The First 48 I can't decide which is my current favorite show.
Javier Bardem has just won for No Country for Old Men. I haven't seen that yet. I don't get out much, not much energy, so I wait till they come out on DVD, or On Demand/cable. My son did take me to see American Gangsters with Russell Crowe & Denzel Washington. One of the Best Movies I've ever seen (I say that every year or so). Like for CRASH.... I could go on-and-on.
I'm off to watch the rest of the show. Before I go: No Country For Old Men has just won for Movie Ensemble. It's supposed to be real violent - horrifying, so it makes me a bit hesitant to go see it, I mean I haven't even watched Saving Private Ryan yet. I can watch Dr G, and The First 48, but scary movies I just cannot watch. I have nightmares. Isn't that weird. Whenever someone's about to do horrible damage to a human being, I cannot watch. I just can't take it. I can watch how they catch bad guys, but not movies about the bad guys doing the bad stuff.
There I go again. Blah Blah Blah. Now, my TV's on the Closer. I like Kyra too. Although I don't watch her show that often.
I'm outta here. All I have here are DOGs. I guess Blogs make you feel like you're talking to SOMEONE.... sorta funny. At least the computer doesn't talk back :)
WE ALL HAVE CHOICES
WOW, Obama "routs" Clinton". Well how about that? I may have to re-think what I'm going to do?
I just can't help thinking what MY mother would say if "I" ran for president. (But then she's only ONE NEGATIVE PERSON) Now, I've been "clean & sober" for almost 25 yrs, and I've been referred to as a "community leader and activist" by our local newspaper for over 10 yrs now. But, GEEZ Louise, I wouldn't dream of running for a political office. Even though I stood on a stage giving a commencement speech to seniors in 1996, and told my story of drug use in my 20's, I still don't like re-living my old life. Running for office, your opponent in his/her bid to win sometimes goes dirty and digs up your old dirt. I'm not the one. Just let me live my life, being a GIVER NOW! Let old dogs lie. I made bad choices, that in one way or another made me who I am now. That old life has given me the insight and street knowledge to not let these kids pull the wool over MY EYES. I tell them, "YOU CAN'T KID A KIDDER!" My ex called me sneaky. Well, I'm just a couple of years past raising TWO teenagers who got in-and-out of trouble, and I put their little butts in-and-out of juvie playing TOUGH LOVE. They turned into wonderful young men. Although, Ernie was killed at 25 by a drunk driver, he was a giver, and wise well beyond his years giving all his friends and acquaintances the best of advice. And, my youngest, now 25, and he's been the closing manager of a restaurant for the past 2 1/2 years. He also has a giving heart and NEVER misses work. Going over a year without calling in sick, twice since being employed.
My 25 yr old son and I were talking recently and I said, "Everyone has a choice of roads to take, no matter where you come from." He said to me, (and I even took the time to write down this quote) "But, some people can't live with the decisions they've made." Last night on The First 48, I heard Lt Toney Armstrong say almost the exact same thing. How true that is, and the reason I started The Moms' House and Youth Unlimited Partnership (YUP!) We focused on what the kids were GOOD at. Not what they did wrong.
As parents, we PRAY that our children make it through these years. I thought Ernie had made it. I remember at 19, we were driving up Ruddell Road in Lacey and he said of two friends (a brother & sister) who were not attending school regularly, (now, don't forget I was the TOUGH LOVE type of parent, my kids went to school EVERY day OR ELSE!!!, he even USED to call me a SNITCH,) "What do you expect? They have no discipline," came spouting out of his mouth, to my disbelief. Had ERNIE really just said kids need DISCIPLINE?
Now, you may be saying, 'Well, he's 19, of course he's growing up,' BUT you must agree that most of us don't acquire "mortality" until we're 25-30 yrs old. That ol' 'It won't happen to me' attitude.' Acknowledging that kids do NEED discipline is a biggie!
I thought MAYBE when he was 25 this sort of comment might occur to him, but he WAS a smart and thoughtful young man who'd seen more than his fair share of life. What a revelation, I was smiling inside, my boy was REALLY growing up....
Now, I make it sound like he was a bad a**, and he had been in some trouble (smoking pot, stuff like that -no robbing people or stores, mostly just dirty UA for pot) when he was 15/16, but by the time he was 18, things were really looking up. I think because he was doing SO well in school and staying out of trouble otherwise, his PO just stopped taking UA's. He ran for and was elected his school's ASB VICE PRESIDENT at the end of his SOPHOMORE YEAR. Pretty good, huh? He was also involved in FBLA (Future Business Leaders of America) Lettered in both ASB & FBLA in Sophomore & Junior years. He got his GED his Junior year then pursued his music career. He was heading to a VERY high-end music college in Florida (he'd all by himself gotten all the loans etc., for the tuition) when he was killed in 2004. Snuffed out just like that on a trip to Safeway to get his morning Lipton Ice Tea. David James Butterton, age 28 gave my stone cold sober boy a ride to the store. A show-off by nature, he decided to drive 80+ MPH around the 25mph curve losing control screeching sideways around the curve hitting the tree broadside right at the passenger door, like an explosion the man across the street said, shaking my whole house, killing my beautiful, beautiful boy INSTANTLY. It took two fire stations deployments, a generator and the jaws of "life" to get him untangled from that car that was literally wrapped around that big white oak tree. That tree shouldn't even be in the line of fire of that curve, but I'm told it's a "rare white oak" and can't be cut, so it sits. There have been MANY MANY accidents at that curve. The folks across the street have had their fences crashed into 10-20 times in the past 10-20 years. The telephone poles on both sides of the street have been replaced numerous times, etc., but the COUNTY does nothing to make that curve safer! I have even had the county commissioner AT MY HOME to discuss the crash, and considered a lawsuit, but set that idea aside due to how the mother of Ernie's son was treating me. Didn't want to help her and her mother who've treated me SO HORRIBLY benefit any further from my and my Ernie's horrible tragedy. When that boy grows up we'll help him, but anything now will just go to them, and everytime anyone sees the boy he's filthy. I feel so bad, but I have to stay out of it. Grandparents have NO RIGHTS, so I'm forced, at least for the time being,to keep my mouth shut! Ernie's friends are beside themselves!
Like I said, I was MISS TOUGH LOVE. Ernie spent one third of one year I think he was 16, in juvie for probation violations. Every time he stayed out all night, at those two kids' house (the neighborhood run-away hang-out) I'd call his P.O. and say, "Bob, Ernie stayed out all night again, file a PV." YUP! I was a snitch all right. But, I was trying to save his life. I called the LPD on that mom and that house SO MANY times. File charges for contributing to the delinquency of a minor, I'd beg. But, NO.... They just let it all go on. FOR YEARS!!!!!!
Check out this one:
I had the LPD go there and arrest Ernie right out of her house after SHE had him charged with stealing HER CAR two days prior. He hit a rock with it and left it sitting on the rock and ran back to her house. She thought she was in trouble for loaning her car to him, so she called it in stolen, then hid him out in her house. (He was 16) They (Thurston County Prosecutors) tried to take that charge all the way to trial. We went to the day of trial before they dropped those charges. WHAT a LOT of money the Thurston County Prosecutor wasted on that one! Tried to get him to "plead or we'll add more charges" He turned around and looked at me," What should I do mom?" was the look. I shook my head NO! They don't have auto theft to barter with!!! And they had to drop a couple weeks later. Playing with me and my kid! I'm not the one!!! I know the game!
Being black in a white community is not easy. Ernie lived it. He was one of about two black kids in his first grade school in Tumwater, and it wasn't much better when we moved 10 miles N to Lacey in 1989. AND, me being white, raising a black son was not easy either. I tried to take it easy and not shove my beliefs down people's throats. Let them see my work, get to KNOW ME, see the OUTCOMES, then they'll follow along both in my state job and my community work.
AND, the Lacey police did just that. I remember the first time Lt., now Commander, Suessman apologized to me for being such a butt head previously. "I am SO....... sorry Diane. You are not who I thought you were. If I have to apologize 8 times I will. I had so much fun at the YUP! meeting. Those kids are great." "That's what I've been trying to tell you guys. These are JUST KIDS who need somewhere to hang out, someone to help and guide them." YEAH SUCCESS!
Lacey PD's John Suessman was a GREAT asset to our YUP! program, as was now Lt., then Gang Det Cliff Ziesemer of the Thurston County Sheriff's Office. Cliff, and Detectives. Casey Salisbury, Dave Haller, and Mike Hutnik all came to that FIRST YUP! meeting in October 1997. I remember Cliff leaning over during the break saying, "They're so polite."
I don't know what he expected, but I had prepped these "so-called gang wanna bees". "Do not be accusatory, we're here to discuss. They cannot comment on anything another police agency has done."
We handed out sheets of paper with two columns. One read: What Can Police Do To Get Along Better With Kids; the other column read: What Can Kids Do To Get Along Better With Police. After chatting over dinner with four County Detectives we used the easel to list back and forth how everyone could get along better. It was SO........... cool! All the kids and cops were shaking hands and exchanging phone numbers at the end of the meeting.
Those YUP! meetings started at 6 pm, with a break at 7, the second half would sometimes go past 9:30 p.m. The kids love it, the police or the mayor or the county commission or the school superintendent or whoever we had that week as our speaker loved it. Community and even our Lt Governor has been involved in YUP! since 1997. We have a standing appointing with Lt Gov Brad Owen in Feb for President's Day at his office at the State Capitol. One year he came to our Back-2-School party at Skateland. I think the kids were a bit more intrigued with his plain-clothed State Patrol body guard who they figured out was armed. Asking him all kinds of questions.
I'd get kids coming by my place on the "off" Wednesdays asking, "Isn't there a YUP! meeting tonight?" Meetings were the 1st & 3rd Wednesday Sept - June. Summers we didn't schedule speakers as the attendance slacked off, but during the school years '97-2001, we had up to 40 for the twice monthly YUP! meetings.
AH Gosh I'm ranting today. I am just passionate about "MY KIDS"!!!
I just can't help thinking what MY mother would say if "I" ran for president. (But then she's only ONE NEGATIVE PERSON) Now, I've been "clean & sober" for almost 25 yrs, and I've been referred to as a "community leader and activist" by our local newspaper for over 10 yrs now. But, GEEZ Louise, I wouldn't dream of running for a political office. Even though I stood on a stage giving a commencement speech to seniors in 1996, and told my story of drug use in my 20's, I still don't like re-living my old life. Running for office, your opponent in his/her bid to win sometimes goes dirty and digs up your old dirt. I'm not the one. Just let me live my life, being a GIVER NOW! Let old dogs lie. I made bad choices, that in one way or another made me who I am now. That old life has given me the insight and street knowledge to not let these kids pull the wool over MY EYES. I tell them, "YOU CAN'T KID A KIDDER!" My ex called me sneaky. Well, I'm just a couple of years past raising TWO teenagers who got in-and-out of trouble, and I put their little butts in-and-out of juvie playing TOUGH LOVE. They turned into wonderful young men. Although, Ernie was killed at 25 by a drunk driver, he was a giver, and wise well beyond his years giving all his friends and acquaintances the best of advice. And, my youngest, now 25, and he's been the closing manager of a restaurant for the past 2 1/2 years. He also has a giving heart and NEVER misses work. Going over a year without calling in sick, twice since being employed.
My 25 yr old son and I were talking recently and I said, "Everyone has a choice of roads to take, no matter where you come from." He said to me, (and I even took the time to write down this quote) "But, some people can't live with the decisions they've made." Last night on The First 48, I heard Lt Toney Armstrong say almost the exact same thing. How true that is, and the reason I started The Moms' House and Youth Unlimited Partnership (YUP!) We focused on what the kids were GOOD at. Not what they did wrong.
As parents, we PRAY that our children make it through these years. I thought Ernie had made it. I remember at 19, we were driving up Ruddell Road in Lacey and he said of two friends (a brother & sister) who were not attending school regularly, (now, don't forget I was the TOUGH LOVE type of parent, my kids went to school EVERY day OR ELSE!!!, he even USED to call me a SNITCH,) "What do you expect? They have no discipline," came spouting out of his mouth, to my disbelief. Had ERNIE really just said kids need DISCIPLINE?
Now, you may be saying, 'Well, he's 19, of course he's growing up,' BUT you must agree that most of us don't acquire "mortality" until we're 25-30 yrs old. That ol' 'It won't happen to me' attitude.' Acknowledging that kids do NEED discipline is a biggie!
I thought MAYBE when he was 25 this sort of comment might occur to him, but he WAS a smart and thoughtful young man who'd seen more than his fair share of life. What a revelation, I was smiling inside, my boy was REALLY growing up....
Now, I make it sound like he was a bad a**, and he had been in some trouble (smoking pot, stuff like that -no robbing people or stores, mostly just dirty UA for pot) when he was 15/16, but by the time he was 18, things were really looking up. I think because he was doing SO well in school and staying out of trouble otherwise, his PO just stopped taking UA's. He ran for and was elected his school's ASB VICE PRESIDENT at the end of his SOPHOMORE YEAR. Pretty good, huh? He was also involved in FBLA (Future Business Leaders of America) Lettered in both ASB & FBLA in Sophomore & Junior years. He got his GED his Junior year then pursued his music career. He was heading to a VERY high-end music college in Florida (he'd all by himself gotten all the loans etc., for the tuition) when he was killed in 2004. Snuffed out just like that on a trip to Safeway to get his morning Lipton Ice Tea. David James Butterton, age 28 gave my stone cold sober boy a ride to the store. A show-off by nature, he decided to drive 80+ MPH around the 25mph curve losing control screeching sideways around the curve hitting the tree broadside right at the passenger door, like an explosion the man across the street said, shaking my whole house, killing my beautiful, beautiful boy INSTANTLY. It took two fire stations deployments, a generator and the jaws of "life" to get him untangled from that car that was literally wrapped around that big white oak tree. That tree shouldn't even be in the line of fire of that curve, but I'm told it's a "rare white oak" and can't be cut, so it sits. There have been MANY MANY accidents at that curve. The folks across the street have had their fences crashed into 10-20 times in the past 10-20 years. The telephone poles on both sides of the street have been replaced numerous times, etc., but the COUNTY does nothing to make that curve safer! I have even had the county commissioner AT MY HOME to discuss the crash, and considered a lawsuit, but set that idea aside due to how the mother of Ernie's son was treating me. Didn't want to help her and her mother who've treated me SO HORRIBLY benefit any further from my and my Ernie's horrible tragedy. When that boy grows up we'll help him, but anything now will just go to them, and everytime anyone sees the boy he's filthy. I feel so bad, but I have to stay out of it. Grandparents have NO RIGHTS, so I'm forced, at least for the time being,to keep my mouth shut! Ernie's friends are beside themselves!
Like I said, I was MISS TOUGH LOVE. Ernie spent one third of one year I think he was 16, in juvie for probation violations. Every time he stayed out all night, at those two kids' house (the neighborhood run-away hang-out) I'd call his P.O. and say, "Bob, Ernie stayed out all night again, file a PV." YUP! I was a snitch all right. But, I was trying to save his life. I called the LPD on that mom and that house SO MANY times. File charges for contributing to the delinquency of a minor, I'd beg. But, NO.... They just let it all go on. FOR YEARS!!!!!!
Check out this one:
I had the LPD go there and arrest Ernie right out of her house after SHE had him charged with stealing HER CAR two days prior. He hit a rock with it and left it sitting on the rock and ran back to her house. She thought she was in trouble for loaning her car to him, so she called it in stolen, then hid him out in her house. (He was 16) They (Thurston County Prosecutors) tried to take that charge all the way to trial. We went to the day of trial before they dropped those charges. WHAT a LOT of money the Thurston County Prosecutor wasted on that one! Tried to get him to "plead or we'll add more charges" He turned around and looked at me," What should I do mom?" was the look. I shook my head NO! They don't have auto theft to barter with!!! And they had to drop a couple weeks later. Playing with me and my kid! I'm not the one!!! I know the game!
Being black in a white community is not easy. Ernie lived it. He was one of about two black kids in his first grade school in Tumwater, and it wasn't much better when we moved 10 miles N to Lacey in 1989. AND, me being white, raising a black son was not easy either. I tried to take it easy and not shove my beliefs down people's throats. Let them see my work, get to KNOW ME, see the OUTCOMES, then they'll follow along both in my state job and my community work.
AND, the Lacey police did just that. I remember the first time Lt., now Commander, Suessman apologized to me for being such a butt head previously. "I am SO....... sorry Diane. You are not who I thought you were. If I have to apologize 8 times I will. I had so much fun at the YUP! meeting. Those kids are great." "That's what I've been trying to tell you guys. These are JUST KIDS who need somewhere to hang out, someone to help and guide them." YEAH SUCCESS!
Lacey PD's John Suessman was a GREAT asset to our YUP! program, as was now Lt., then Gang Det Cliff Ziesemer of the Thurston County Sheriff's Office. Cliff, and Detectives. Casey Salisbury, Dave Haller, and Mike Hutnik all came to that FIRST YUP! meeting in October 1997. I remember Cliff leaning over during the break saying, "They're so polite."
I don't know what he expected, but I had prepped these "so-called gang wanna bees". "Do not be accusatory, we're here to discuss. They cannot comment on anything another police agency has done."
We handed out sheets of paper with two columns. One read: What Can Police Do To Get Along Better With Kids; the other column read: What Can Kids Do To Get Along Better With Police. After chatting over dinner with four County Detectives we used the easel to list back and forth how everyone could get along better. It was SO........... cool! All the kids and cops were shaking hands and exchanging phone numbers at the end of the meeting.
Those YUP! meetings started at 6 pm, with a break at 7, the second half would sometimes go past 9:30 p.m. The kids love it, the police or the mayor or the county commission or the school superintendent or whoever we had that week as our speaker loved it. Community and even our Lt Governor has been involved in YUP! since 1997. We have a standing appointing with Lt Gov Brad Owen in Feb for President's Day at his office at the State Capitol. One year he came to our Back-2-School party at Skateland. I think the kids were a bit more intrigued with his plain-clothed State Patrol body guard who they figured out was armed. Asking him all kinds of questions.
I'd get kids coming by my place on the "off" Wednesdays asking, "Isn't there a YUP! meeting tonight?" Meetings were the 1st & 3rd Wednesday Sept - June. Summers we didn't schedule speakers as the attendance slacked off, but during the school years '97-2001, we had up to 40 for the twice monthly YUP! meetings.
AH Gosh I'm ranting today. I am just passionate about "MY KIDS"!!!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Washington Post Endorses Hillary
Saying, "Mrs. Clinton has more than cleared that bar, using her years in the Senate well to immerse herself in national security issues, and has won the respect of world leaders and many in the American military."
The Democratic editorial contrasts Clinton and Obama -- calling her "the brilliant if at times harsh-sounding senator from New York" and him "the incandescent if still undefined senator from Illinois."
The Times went on to say Clinton "sometimes overstates the importance of [her] resume," but that upon hearing "her policies and answers for America's big problems, we are hugely impressed by the depth of her knowledge, by the force of her intellect and by the breadth of, yes, her experience."
New York is one of a host of states that will vote during the February 5 Super Tuesday primaries.
When I got an e-mail from Obama on my Black Planet account, I wrote back: I believe you have a great future, but I do not believe you have the experience to be President of the United States - YET!
Yes, I'd like to see a PERSON OF COLOR in the WHITE HOUSE, but one who's ready, and in my opinion Barack Obama is NOT READY. Get a few more terms, not just ONE TERM in the Senate, and THEN run for the biggie!
As a white woman, who was married to a black man, and who raised a mixed son (a WONDERFUL young man who was killed by a drunk driver at 25 yr, in 2004), I raised my son to be a proud and SMART Black man in America. Don't put yourself in positions to get harrassed by the police, or stress out your neighbors, thinking this or that. Just because you have the RIGHT to do this or that, be SMART about it. I recently told a young man in my care - you are black and you should not be just riding your bike around for no reason after dark. You put yourself out there to get harrassed by cops, and what might the neighbors think you are up to? Unless you have somewhere to go, you don't just go riding around at 16. Now, other Black Parents might say, 'you are telling him he can't do this or that because he's black.' No, I'm teaching him to be a SMART black man in America. That's just the way it is! My Ernie got harrassed and harrassed and harrassed by local law enforsement from the time he was 14. Not to mention, I may know things about this 16 yr old that those other Black parents do not know: like this 16 yr old may already have theft issues and I am also protecting my neighbors from this young man and not putting cheese in front of a mouse's nose!
The Democratic editorial contrasts Clinton and Obama -- calling her "the brilliant if at times harsh-sounding senator from New York" and him "the incandescent if still undefined senator from Illinois."
The Times went on to say Clinton "sometimes overstates the importance of [her] resume," but that upon hearing "her policies and answers for America's big problems, we are hugely impressed by the depth of her knowledge, by the force of her intellect and by the breadth of, yes, her experience."
New York is one of a host of states that will vote during the February 5 Super Tuesday primaries.
When I got an e-mail from Obama on my Black Planet account, I wrote back: I believe you have a great future, but I do not believe you have the experience to be President of the United States - YET!
Yes, I'd like to see a PERSON OF COLOR in the WHITE HOUSE, but one who's ready, and in my opinion Barack Obama is NOT READY. Get a few more terms, not just ONE TERM in the Senate, and THEN run for the biggie!
As a white woman, who was married to a black man, and who raised a mixed son (a WONDERFUL young man who was killed by a drunk driver at 25 yr, in 2004), I raised my son to be a proud and SMART Black man in America. Don't put yourself in positions to get harrassed by the police, or stress out your neighbors, thinking this or that. Just because you have the RIGHT to do this or that, be SMART about it. I recently told a young man in my care - you are black and you should not be just riding your bike around for no reason after dark. You put yourself out there to get harrassed by cops, and what might the neighbors think you are up to? Unless you have somewhere to go, you don't just go riding around at 16. Now, other Black Parents might say, 'you are telling him he can't do this or that because he's black.' No, I'm teaching him to be a SMART black man in America. That's just the way it is! My Ernie got harrassed and harrassed and harrassed by local law enforsement from the time he was 14. Not to mention, I may know things about this 16 yr old that those other Black parents do not know: like this 16 yr old may already have theft issues and I am also protecting my neighbors from this young man and not putting cheese in front of a mouse's nose!
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Current Affairs
As a person who keeps up on the news, I watch CNN throughout the day, I have thoughts on a couple of our HOT TOPICS:
1. The murdered Marine, Maria Lauterbach.
Have they checked the handwriting from the note she left on Dec. 14?
Just seems strange to me that she ALL THE SUDDEN decided to "leave". Maybe suspected Marine killer Cesar Laurean showed up and:
1) told her they were leaving together, that he was leaving his wife, and she wrote the note herself....or
2) forced her to write the note (any signed of stress in handwriting), or
3) maybe he wrote the note himself? Was it handwritten at all? Maybe it was typed ... hum...
Food for thought. Hadn't heard any thoughts on that "note," BUT I've been thinking...
2. Britney Spears
Britney looked a bit more lucid on the TMZ tapes the other evening when she was out shopping without Adnan. Everyone is talking mess about him, BUT maybe he IS helping get her clean and sober. Anyone thought of that???
The game ain't over till the fat lady sings. None of us know what goes on behind closed doors.
Just some thoughts on a couple of items out there in the news.
1. The murdered Marine, Maria Lauterbach.
Have they checked the handwriting from the note she left on Dec. 14?
Just seems strange to me that she ALL THE SUDDEN decided to "leave". Maybe suspected Marine killer Cesar Laurean showed up and:
1) told her they were leaving together, that he was leaving his wife, and she wrote the note herself....or
2) forced her to write the note (any signed of stress in handwriting), or
3) maybe he wrote the note himself? Was it handwritten at all? Maybe it was typed ... hum...
Food for thought. Hadn't heard any thoughts on that "note," BUT I've been thinking...
2. Britney Spears
Britney looked a bit more lucid on the TMZ tapes the other evening when she was out shopping without Adnan. Everyone is talking mess about him, BUT maybe he IS helping get her clean and sober. Anyone thought of that???
The game ain't over till the fat lady sings. None of us know what goes on behind closed doors.
Just some thoughts on a couple of items out there in the news.
The Moms' House / YUP! (Youth Unlimited Partnership)
From 1996-2001 I hosted up to 40 local youth (some gang wanna-bees) over for Dinner Speaker Meetings at our home twice a month. With topics including How Police & Youth Can Get Along Better (our first meeting) to Emergency Preparedness, Black History Month, Date Rape & Dating Violence, and guests speakers of police, teachers, fire fighters, and County Commissioners.In addition to the YUP! Meetings, there were field trips to not only job sites, but fun things like Seahawk and Mariner games (with transportation to those games provided by the Lacey Police Dept.) Also, Wild Waves, Car Washes, Camping Trips, Bar-B-Ques, an All City Hip Hop Picnic with our Lacey Mayor as the Graffiti Artwork judge, Eight Annual Back-2-School Parties at Skateland celebrating the “onset” of school every September open to all community members, with themes like: YUP! School’s Cool or YUP! I Want My Education and Mission Possible! YUP! was a huge hit! A mini-boys and girls club right out of my home. Not only a hit with the kids, BUT also with the local law enforcement and the N Thurston School District to many of our community leaders. Thurston County's former gang detective, now Lieutenant Cliff Ziesemer said to me in 2000, "Diane this County doesn't have a gang problem anymore, and it's not because of what we did, it's because of you and your YUP! program." That's what YUP! and The Moms’ House did for this community.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Nicey Nicey on the Dems Vegas
I guess I'm glad Barack and Hillary decided to make nice. Hillary is back looking presidential talking shop rather than about her opponent. A much better strategy, I think.
My day has been stressful, but what's new. Former tenants testing me. WWJD.....
I'm planning an Emergency Preparedness meeting for the end of the month. I used to put them on annually for my youth program so it shouldn't be too hard to get together. I'm good at this stuff. I'll call around for a speaker tomorrow.
My day has been stressful, but what's new. Former tenants testing me. WWJD.....
I'm planning an Emergency Preparedness meeting for the end of the month. I used to put them on annually for my youth program so it shouldn't be too hard to get together. I'm good at this stuff. I'll call around for a speaker tomorrow.
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